Adventures in Drywall
The First Annual Dry T-shirt Contest Results
Best overall, third runner up:Appleton Lathing Corp., Neenah, Wis.
Design by owner Timothy VanWyk
Modeled by Rob Larson and Don Springhetti
It's obvious Tim spent some time designing these shirts. Actually there were two submissions. The pre-job shirt read:
"Your mission should you decide to accept it, is to install a 5-story, state-of-the-art hospital in 12 months. This will be the biggest job you have ever done. You will be asked go faster than you have ever gone before. Your quality must be better than it was before. The drywall involved laid end to end will pave one lane of HWY 41 from Green Bay to Milwaukee. The drywall beads would stretch from Monasha to Fond du Lac across Lake Winnabago. There is enough steel stud and track required to build 33 modern homes. The Fry Trims will cost more than your vehicle. The ceiling tile installed would cover the playing surface of the Timber Rattler Stadium five times.
THIS IS YOUR MISSION
FAILURE IS NOT AN OPTION
IT CAN BE DONE
(This T-shirt will self-destruct in 5 seconds)"
After completion proud workers wore the following:
"My Company did the Drywall at Mercy Medical.
Over 185 miles of metal studs & track
2 miles of corner bead
Over 500,000 square feet of insulation
And enough drywall to cover Lambeau Field 31 TIMES!!
And all I got was this lousy T-shirt"
Best overall, second runner up:Sparlin Drywall Co., Pinon Hill, Calif.
Design by owners Mike and Jackie Sparlin
After failing to find an artist capable of drawing what they envisioned, Mike and Jackie decide to do it themselves. Nice job. It is obvious many hours of your youth were wasted reading Mad magazine ?.
Best overall Grand Prize winner:THE MUD MAN, Mike Sparrow, Fort Smith, Ark.
Design by Precision Graphix
Screen printing by Action Printing
Butt model Mike Sparrow
"Here's my shirt. I very much like the Adventures In Drywall, if you guys aren't drywallers, you've hung around them too much. Take a close look: The dog, beer and the truck are true, but you left out a few other things. Like having been arrested, being unable to get a suit-and-tie job, having done body work on your truck with quick-set, etc.
"Starting on the front of the shirt. When we (drywall finishers, mudders, mud monkeys, mechanics, mud rats) go into a bank, we never get credit for what trade we're in. I finally got tired of hearing, "Hey are you a painter or a plasterer?" So I tell them my name is Mike Sparrow and I raise pigeons. Some get it, some don't. Mostly I get a look like 'gross,' especially if I have mud on my face.
"Now, to the back of the shirt. This is my best side. Hey, drywallers need credit also for the semi-crack show. It's not just for plumbers. By the way, I posed for the behind shot. Notice the 'Mud Beer.' Hey, Homer Simpson has Duff Beer, and Drew has Buzz Beer right?"
The MUD MAN-"Mud On"
P.S. Drywall exists in Arkansas too!
As you may have noticed, I'm writing solo now. Bill has gotten a national position and is too busy to even drink with me now, let alone write this column. I wish him well, and hopefully when he is filthy rich and powerful, he will let me ride on his coattails. I will be contributing bi-monthly now. It will continue to be your forum to voice what's going on in the wonderful world of drywall.
Remember: Drywall can be an excuse for you to be creative and get your mug in a magazine.